Worthiness And Boundary Basics

SPEAKER_02 0:34

conference room on the whiteboards and we map out their faith healthy relationship business and finances and we didn't make it through.

SPEAKER_00 0:41

No.

SPEAKER_02 0:41

Um which was great which was fine but that was one of the things for you too even in you being able to set boundaries was hard for you. Yeah. So we had that conversation.

SPEAKER_03 0:52

Yeah. I think part of the setting boundaries was a nice follow-up to the embracing the worthiness. I mean at the end of the day we're all not worthy of the grace and that we're given that that's a statement. But the fact that I can embrace that you know I am a child of the most high God and he loves me and he's got me and he's always having the palm of my hand and I look at that footprints in the sand poster a whole lot differently now in my life.

Moving Family In With Clear Rules

SPEAKER_03 1:20

But we just recently had we're obviously we're high school sweethearts but we didn't get married till 30 years later that's a story if you want to hear it is a healed by God mafia. It's like a hallmark that sounds that sound like a story over a taco and a margarita it truly is but we have my son and his wife and their two little ones and one of them autistic living in our house now. It's been there about two and a half months now mind you this is our son that we had tough love out of the house at 21 because no you're not going to wake us up at 3 a.m in the morning playing video games as a 21 year old drinking and swearing at a 13 year old from cross country at a video game now while you're driving pizzas 20 hours a week. Get out get a job get a life be a grown man like let's have that happen. So fast forward a decade we're we're married we're working and he's looking to level up in his life and we had a long conversation it was actually more his idea than mine and we brought him back in and we sat down with Ken and we talked a lot about the relationship and the dynamics and all that had occurred and whatever and so I put together a 20 slide PowerPoint on the boundaries of moving into our house. And I will I it was and we spent two hours walking through that thing his wife and himself and the two of us and I will tell you best thing I've ever done in my life because my son's big and a liar and I'm like okay great so like we talked a lot about communication don't come at me like we don't yell at each other. Yelling's not a part of my life anymore. I'm like I'm not having it like we're not going to go there and he started and it was in there that if we feel like we can't have conversations we're going to walk away until coolerheads prevail. And then the next slide was and if we're walking away and you don't want to let it go we're going to agree to be reminded that we're going to walk away until coolerheads prevail. So we had two weeks in we had that moment as mother and son and I was like look you're getting a little feisty and we agreed we'd walk away till commerheads prevail so I'm going to walk away right now and I started to walk away he did that and like came up out of the chair like he was going to come run after me to like keep it going and his wife went oh no no and so he turned and went don't you tell me and I so I whipped right around and said now we walked through that PowerPoint and you agreed that we weren't going to do this and you agreed that you'd be reminded I said so were you lying when you said yes or are you going to make a different choice now and having that go-to of well because I get a lot of the for those of you with kids I'm sure we never said that. Yeah it still happens at 32 just to throw that out there. So be ready for it but it has been wonderful. I mean different obviously but no yelling no fight like that boundaries think has made all the difference and it has been a really successful transition of blessing for us to get to be around the little ones especially talking with the with Kenny our artistic grandson like he is so engaging with him like it's just such a blessing but I don't feel like it would be going that way if we hadn't done the PowerPoint and we definitely wouldn't have even thought about the PowerPoint or boundaries had we not talked about the dynamics of relationships that's second color. So it really I mean from a personal and a professional it's just been life changing to have you interest

Why Success Still Felt Stuck

SPEAKER_03 4:42

kind of thing.

SPEAKER_02 4:43

So you guys the business side because guys here's the deal everybody comes in and they think they're here for business or finances and about 97% of the time it has nothing to do with business and finances. It's faith health and relationships. I'm telling you almost every time it's faith health and relationships which for you guys exactly what was business was already doing good you guys were you guys were multiple seven figures or nearing multiple seven figures in your business what made you take the step Ryan to get connected in the circle and get connected with us at GSD we got to a certain point we kind of plateaued and I didn't have a vision and I didn't have direction for the company we had two million dollars and I was like okay I worked my tail off to get here now what and I didn't know what to do.

SPEAKER_01 5:32

So you know Chad was in the group and I was looking right I was looking to connect with different business leaders and who was out there reading about stuff like where do I want this thing to go? What do I want it to be? Who do I want it to be in I know I don't want to pay any more taxes so I'm going to figure that out you know all that good stuff. And then Chad was like you got to go you got to go you got to go and I was like I'm too busy I'm I'm running the business running around I think how many times I hear I'm too busy so I've been touching on my arm like I prayed that night Thursday night I didn't decide till Friday morning that I was coming and I'm like or no Wednesday night. And I'm like all right I'm gonna go I'm gonna just pause my business life and jump in.

Weight Loss Sleep And New Habits

SPEAKER_01 6:15

And and I got the direction I need in life forget about I mean all five pillars I needed that I lost 41 pounds. I've been trying for six years to lose 10 pounds and it just shouldn't not exaggeration.

SPEAKER_03 6:31

Would you say I said it's not an exaggeration I've watched and struggle for six years now with diet after this and whatever and blah blah blah I've done every diet I love food.

SPEAKER_01 6:43

I worked for Coca-Cola and traveled the country went to every sporting event and ate every type of food there is and gave like 80 pounds.

SPEAKER_02 6:51

I weighed 333 right I wait two eight whatever now it's flexible one of my coolest moments for you guys if something or something we were on one of our Monday morning calls and you were sharing wins and I think Ramona said yeah our whole closet I can't walk my closets because all LeBron's pants are laying on the floor because none of his pants fit him anymore.

SPEAKER_03 7:13

Oh my god his shorts fell off in the driveway yesterday bringing the trash can down I'm like I bought new pants you need new shorts I kid you not it's just like that song pants on the ground pants on the ground I have to wear a belt with my pants down on my shorts because I'm afraid they're gonna fall down like they're just I'm my body's shaped differently now.

SPEAKER_01 7:34

How good is that good does that feel for you to know my joints don't hurt my mind's fresh and I'm getting more sleep so that's that's key too right I was getting four to six hours of sleep and not good sleep. Going to bed late midnight getting up at five o'clock or whatever it is.

SPEAKER_02 7:52

One of the things we talked about their whiteboard session on their faith health relationships when we got into the health component the relationship component she likes to stay up late he likes to go to bed early I said well okay we're willing to fix that and so we literally navigated a plan for you guys to be able to do this.

SPEAKER_01 8:10

So we go to bed like 10, 1030 and I get my eight hours I get up before her and shower and then I wake her up so that's how it works.

SPEAKER_03 8:20

I'm going to bed at 10 or 10 30 but I'm still kind of laying there awake till about 12 1 o'clock which is fine it's it's it's a process I'm getting there and but I also am getting more sleep than each sleeping though.

SPEAKER_02 8:31

Well it gives us like a good segue right here.

Marriage Check In And Faith Return

SPEAKER_02 8:33

Marriage. Tell me about your marriage what where were you guys at on scale of one to ten with 10 being the highest where were you at in January and where would you guys say you're at right now we used to do the dating game thing we're doing for the corner couples weekend right now but we should do that we're actually doing a dating game for the corner couples weekend or bringing incident we're gonna do a dating game. Oh anyway so tell me where you were and where you're at where would you say you're at but you were at in January okay so I most people are gonna think she's lying but I'm gonna say 10.

SPEAKER_03 9:05

That's where you know hear our story and you'll go why I say that he's he's yeah if I said that said 10 I'm in trouble so but no I can say eight because I own my own level of ridiculousness.

SPEAKER_01 9:19

I think we're seven and a half eight and I think now we've we we've probably gained a point just because we're more focused on I'm more focused on leading the household right like yeah being faith based and I mean it I'm ashamed of saying this but I'm gonna say it because we're authentic right we had not gone to church since COVID. Yeah we have been aligned and all that but we had not gone to church and that was one of the first pillars we talked about was faith right and it's not that I didn't pray that I didn't talk to Jesus all day long. It's just that we didn't go and we weren't engaging in church. Well we're members now we're engaged we're tithing we're doing all the stuff that we should be doing and giving back to him and look at this we got two new hires that are killing it so giving back to us but for our relationship I mean we're high school sweethearts had we're soulmates that got re the mafia wanted to break my legs if I kept seeing her and I was 18 years old scared the living but the sent somebody to your workplace working and he came to the register and gave me all of my all my letters that I wrote all my mid stake footballs if we folded up because yeah we're then old because they were in the 80s right I mean and they came to me and said you can't sit here anymore and I'm like no we have this whole plan like we're high school sweethearts we're gonna go to school together I'm gonna wait for her I'm going to communicate and play baseball all this stuff and they didn't believe it they said no you're not doing it. She's in high school and you're there and you're done and they broke us out. So I went this way she went that way I had three kids I got divorced after 10 years she had two kids and we got them get back together. And she had no idea that the mafia threatened me until I until we talked 30 years later. That's my mom so anyway our relationship we're so we texted each other for a long time talking about different things in our life how do we line up in faith how do we line up in music everything clos you know anything in the closet that we had skeletons were out on the auto totally authentic because I'm like I'm not doing this again.

SPEAKER_03 11:34

Yeah and if I do it with somebody it's gonna be totally out there and we know each other you know there's no fake mess going on right and we and then I said all right it's time to talk to you because we did all that on text we were texting until like six in the morning and then I said to talk to you and when she when I heard her voice it was the same voice from high school and I said there she is so I mean that's how good our relationship is my I was I was dying at the time too so yeah late clinic boss the whole thing so and truly and after 25 years of marriage and being a C C D teacher in the Catholic church getting kicked out for leaving an abusive person. I was in a and now I'm dying I was in a really bad spot in my faith and he brought me back to church and back to Jesus and I actually am a healed story from a pastor that was visiting in Africa to a church that I literally went to one time that day and that was it.

SPEAKER_02 12:37

It was and here we are so the so the journey for you guys over the past six months being a part of the circle the whiteboard session what's the biggest what's the biggest thing from the number but to say one thing from the whiteboard session with you that you feel like has changed the most since we had those so well actually we spent two days together because you guys could get it all in in four hours we had to do another two hours that was great.

Couples Leading At Work And Home

SPEAKER_03 13:03

Yeah it really was well I talked with faith and all that stuff I think probably the communication stuff and the boundaries that we talked about we have an amazing marriage but a big thing from the whiteboard session and actually just from being in the the the community GSD community is there are a lot of other husband and wife entrepreneurs to really navigate the difference of who we are to one another at work while still being respectful of who we are to one another in life because I show up to work and I'm the wife all the time in my mind.

SPEAKER_01 13:42

I'm not just you know the partner in the business and really learning that communication stuff and recognizing that yeah like there's there's a difference in how we function but we still need to recognize who we are to why not at the end of the day like and navigating all of that especially as we're in growth mode and adding people to the team because it was effortless really when it was just the two of us because it's the two of us anyway like we're in it to win it for life partners for life right there you go but now we have a team and navigating that and we clearly communicate very differently yeah strong silent type over there so what what shift for you what's shifting for you from the whiteboard session so for me I spent 30 years in the food business working from being in a supermarket putting items on the shelf as a merchandiser to ending my career of Coca-Cola being a national director of juice managing the whole country $50 million traveling so working hard was my mantra and I worked all the time till nine o'clock at night like all the time so I took that into this business and obviously let my health go. Right relationship was good the first one wasn't but the second one definitely was but and then my relationship with God was different along the way. So what changed for me is strengthening my faith and then taking care of myself so I could take care of who I'm responsible for. Because I'm not just responsible for me and driving the business I'm responsible for her my family my work family and all of our clients I'd pray for all our clients every day that the phone rings for them because that's what we're supposed to do. I'm not there to sell on a quick ad and get revenue and move on down the road and pay my bills. That's just a benefit of doing what I do for them. And that's how we run our business.

SPEAKER_03 16:03

I think part of the the takeaway and and I talked about it with Josh my friend back there too when I met with him last is it was a flip of a switch of a mindset thing of we're not business owners we're business stewards. And Ken and I talk a lot about that. I'm feeling very strongly called now about taking all of my my teaching background and my my now my business stuff and realizing you're not a business owner. You're still the same steward you've always been you're just stewarding a different way and different things and with a different focus. And so that's where I've been kind of focusing my mindset and my efforts and my professional development and shifting who I've been in the company to being more of the chief stewardship officer. That's like kind of my own personal title for me now in our company.

SPEAKER_01 16:58

One of the major things that I've learned in business and then it came back to me and hit me in the face with being in the circle is you can spend your whole life in God's second for me right now. You can spend your whole life working hard but not realizing the impact that you have with the people you're working with and focusing on just I got to a certain level in my career and I'm like I want to just want to make a hundred thousand dollars and I'm good. Well I did that 20 years ago when I got there I had no idea what to do next. So when you're in when you're doing entrepreneurship and you're running a business you set goals for yourself but it's always got to be changing because you'll get to that goal and then you won't know what to do. Right? So it's a constant it it's never like all right I got to that goal and I'm done and that's why the circle's so great because there's a whole group of us that talk about how do we just keep improving and reach kind of our vision. It's a vision with a goal of giving giving back and and doing it in in God's favor but that's one mistake I made kind of growing up is oh I just want to hit this phone and I'm done.

SPEAKER_02 18:18

I don't have to work I don't have to work anymore I chase status money everything and when I got there I was like not fulfilled no peace no joy so for so for us today we're sitting here I'm gonna give people an opportunity just many that aren't connected with us to take a journey with us over the next 12 months what would you say to somebody that because we present this opportunity for them what would your what would your words and encouragement be for them lean in and don't be afraid because the fear is never gonna go away what Ken said earlier which was totally awesome is you gotta break through the barrier of that fear and then you're gonna have to do it again.

SPEAKER_01 19:01

And you're gonna have to do it again. One person told me and we were standing in the back room we were getting ready to go out and talk like from from Coke right 2000 people out there I gotta I gotta need a talk and he's and I'm like I'm looking nervous I'm sweating and he goes and this guy was the president of one of our divisions and he goes yeah I'm nervous too and I'm like no way he's like we're all fearful just at different points and different levels but you know what when you plow through that fear it gets

Fear Investment And Leveling Up

SPEAKER_01 19:30

easier it's like when I steal a base or I hit a home run it gets easier over time you just you figure out the two things it doesn't matter what it is but you can when you're afraid embrace it and plug through it. And that's one of the things that I love to do.

SPEAKER_03 19:46

And I think from a me standpoint what I could say is is I spend a lot of my life really really poor so spending money is hard for me like really hard because teacher salary poor like that's a thing. Investing in this my friend Ashley back there says it all the time you can always make more money but you can't make more time so be smart about where you spend it right and who you spend it with. So I spend a lot of time with her I just love her. But the money you will spend on the time you spend with them is it's it's just invaluable. It's priceless what you get back. It is absolutely priceless what you get back. Make the investment truly like he he went oh yeah he said what was it eight gram like the yeah and and he immediately went absolutely and I'm I'm on the other zoom side going we're we're gonna spend how much for for what like what like it and I'll tell you something I would spend a hundred times that much for what we've gotten out of it.

SPEAKER_01 20:53

In my 30 years being in a professional industry like Coke and then being exposed to speakers after speakers after speakers some of the men that can't talk to he is in that he is at that level he doesn't want to say it but he is and I'm I'm just on for the ride to watch what God does for this group and I'm glad to be part of it.

SPEAKER_03 21:15

Super proud to be in his proximity like we we talked about like Ashley and I were talking about it like long before we went to the creep thing and said you know like we're we're in a B and I group together it's a great group he came to talk to it's highly successful all that but you know when you want to level up in your life you need to level up with who you are in proximity with and there are people that we've gotten to hear that I'm on the edge of crying and I don't cry.

SPEAKER_02 21:43

He does not cry yeah that's what I just said earlier I didn't work out well for her either did I'm emotional I'm emotional when I you know my mom died I was a mess but I don't cry you know and I'm on the edge because you didn't cry in a way though well yeah I guess we can get the words out yeah hey here's what here's what we're gonna do um I know we got I we're over so I know some people have to get out of here at two my team is gonna hand out a couple a couple sheets of paper for you guys I just want to walk through I'll take five minutes can I get five more minutes to get time that gives us five more minutes it's five minutes of the thing guys you may not have a margaret in unit at 230 but you'll have one at 240 I guess now we'll be far after that but I just want to share with you guys a real quick about kind of the opportunities to be able to take a journey with us and kind of what that looks like. David can you put up uh we've got three rooms one mission and this is some of you guys are already connected in what we're doing our community in our circle in our corner the three levels of engagement that we have you can see I'm gonna call them some more three levels of engagement that we have uh our community is an online is an online only way of for you to interact with us our community

Community Circle And Corner Options

SPEAKER_02 22:52

is all of our all of our digital recordings all of our Conferences, our courses that we have online, our mindset strategy, leadership development. Anything that we have that's digital that you can access, that's a 997 lifetime access. So it's 997 bucks, you get lifetime access to that circle. Uh pop up that circle for me real quick because this is what this is actually what Brian and Ramona are part of. Several people in the room are part of our circle. Um, what we do in our circle, it's just kind of that next elevated experience. Our circle, we do two Zoom calls a week. And when you say Zoom calls, we'll have 20 to 35 to 40 people on a Zoom call on a Monday morning on a Wednesday night. This month, we're actually taking this month's series is called Problem Solve. So we're taking our corner guys. Dimitri is one of about 13 to 14 business owners in our corner, a business is from about 2 million to about 38 or 39 million a year in revenue. We're actually output on Zoom calls on Wednesday night, and you're bringing your biggest pain point for your business. And we're doing breakout rooms with corner guys or myself over that and just helping you walk through and solve those problems real time. Our Monday morning, Wednesday night calls, guys, we theme those out of our core five faith, health, relationship, business, and finances. Um, last month, I think we did marketing. Was that where we're at last month, guys? Marketing, I think, is where we were. Um I had Sharon Lecter. Uh, anybody read Ridstad Portad? Give me a thumbs up. Uh, Sharon Lecter, who's a co-author of Ridge Dad Portad, who's a dear friend of mine. One of the text messages I got this morning uh was from Sharon. Um, she's been a dear friend of mine for about five or six years. Sharon came on a couple weeks ago and talked about Ridstad and talked about the whole vision behind and how that got created. She sold more books on finances than any female in the history of the world. Um, so we're bringing in guests like her and Gary Brecca and different guys on Monday and Wednesdays for us to really, how can we help, how can we help you grow as a leader in each of those core five areas, and then bringing my relationships in to be able to help with that as well. Two executive tickets to create, two executive tickets to create get you in all three days, Wednesday nights pre-conference, all day, all day Thursday, all day Friday, and then Friday nights, my favorite time of the year is our black tie sorry, which is my fave. We have an absolute blast. You guys also get a free call with Prime Corporate, um, who are dear friends of mine to walk through either an entity creation, um, if you need some kind of entity created LLC, S Corp, C Corp. They'll also do an entity review, which we've done for some of our core guys who have multiple different businesses, S Corps, C Corps, LLCs. When they did mine, I had three. Uh when they did mine, they they actually created a holding company for me in Wyoming for tax purposes. So they do all the tax mitigation stuff, and then put my LLC, my S, my two LLCs, my S Corp under that for tax purposes. So we give you that as well. You'll get to have a conversation, an hour-long tax, an hour-long conversation with those guys. Actually, you guys are yeah, you guys are actually doing that. Yeah. So then everything that we do in the community is included as well. So that's the circle is of $4.97 uh investment a month. Get you a ton and really get you access to the people that we've got in the room. Uh Dimitri is the one corner guy that I've got here today. Our corner, I'll walk you through that as well, really quick. Corner guys, your business needs to be doing um at least a million dollars a year in revenue. It needs to be in that one to half a one to one and a half million starting point for this to be able to make sense for you. So this, these are my one-on-one guys. I do a one-on-one call. I think Demetri, we're every Monday morning at 10:30 a.m. with Demetrian Shane. Their business, they own a construction company that do about in between 10 to 12 million a year in revenue. Do a ton of work for Chick-fil-A and some other big companies. I meet with those guys. We do that's the whiteboard session that we talked about. They actually wanted to do a whiteboard session, so we created a product for that, for you guys. You were the first one. Now I've actually done two since I've done the one with you guys. Uh the whiteboard session is a four to six hour session where we literally take those core five areas and we plow through what do you want in your faith? What do you want in your health? And that's with Brian in your health. The I think one of the biggest, the coolest things I saw ever in the whiteboard session was when I started talking with you guys about the white and you and you lost it. You were so afraid of his health and him not living on it. Yeah.

SPEAKER_03 27:19

I waited 30. He proposed to me at his senior prom. I was a 15-year-old sophomore, and he proposed the second time 30 years later to the day in the spot we met in our high school. And he promised me, oh yeah. He had them put the disco ball back up in the cafeteria where it had school dances. Our kids were there. They announced it over the loud speaker. I'm a former Miss Cheerleader New England. They had the cheerleaders come out and do a C Shees. She said yes routine. He's a prince charming for sure, by Central Life story. He really is. Bro, I need to get some notes, bro.

SPEAKER_02 27:49

We need to do something to have more Greek.

SPEAKER_03 27:51

He promised me 40 years, and where his health was at when we met you six months ago was completely different. We were pre-diabetic, high blood pressure, all kinds of things, and struggling, and I just was like, I can't go back to life without this man. I just can't.

SPEAKER_01 28:07

I'm on no drugs, and I can't do it. And then this changes and my blood pressure is lowest as ever been. I'm 20 or 80, it's like normal good.

SPEAKER_02 28:18

So on the corner side, guys, the the article we we kicked that off of that whiteboard session. Two seats to two seats to each of the masterminds. Then we do two masterminds a year. Then I do special corner weekends. So for the men's, uh, we're doing horse jolties. He's coming in to speak to our men for the couples. In a couple weeks, I've got Dag Riches, who wrote the Latin respect book. Our company Why to do that here. Got all 13 to 14 cornered couples that are coming in for that. It's gonna be an amazing time. So here's what we're gonna do. I'm gonna pray and we're gonna dismiss because I told you I'd have you out of here early. I've already made notes of like, okay, three hours isn't enough. Last year we did it from 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., which is probably what we're gonna do again this year. So we have enough time to do everything that we want to do inside of that. My team is here, David, Andrea Ashley, myself. Um, we're gonna go to El Don right down the street. Would love for you guys to join us. If you have any questions about what it looks like to connect with us over the next 12 months, I'd love for you to connect with me or David. Um, this help you guys.

SPEAKER_00 29:14

It did. Good.

SPEAKER_02 29:15

Awesome. In progress. Father, thank you for today. And uh, we just honor you and bless you for this opportunity. Uh God, thank you for giving us grace. We went over that. I just pray, God, you give us just an amazing time of

Invitation Prayer And Closing

SPEAKER_02 29:26

connection and fellowship this afternoon. And we honor and we love you in Jesus' name. Amen. David, go kick with the music. Guys, we'll see you shortly at El Ghana.